Rapid Teen Models 18+

Above: KissPromise

So again, Mya has caught my attention; this time for her gig in My Love is Like Wo. Although the viddy was released almost two years ago, I hadn’t seen it until recently, and her appearance starkly contrasted with what I remembered her looking like.

Don’t get me wrong, she’s still the near-talentless showbiz droid that doesn’t write, produce or probably even sing her hobo sack of forgettable tunes. Indeed, such image-based ‘artists’ have become the norm for musicians of this generation, so I’m not surprised at the least.

But back to the video – it got me thinking: have her looks improved, or have my personal standards sunk lower than the Mariana trench? Age does a funny thing to one’s 10-scale.

I’ve noticed that her production crew uses a lot of pomp and glitz to mask her squeaky attempt at vocals and her physically awkward appearance. The direction in My Love is Like Wo seems to be always focused away from her face, usually highlighting her ass, clothing or strip routine. But this time, against all odds, it somehow comes together rather nicely. The smart and tricky editing, the sole focus on the performer and the sexy costumes all showcase Mya in the best light possible.

So in summary – don’t attempt to make sense of this post!! How, reflecting on my feelings about an overrated R&B singer warrants a long-winded post on this illustrious blog — god only knows! Go hit up the video remix below. And you’ll like it because I didn’t use her music.

Above: Mindi and Richard from Beauty and the Geek face the firing squad.

I normally don’t watch much TV. Typically I limit my viewing selection to Family Guy, South Park and the new BSG. But the other day I caught a clip of WB’s Beauty and the Geek, and holy fuck did I find myself sucked into the premise of the show! Seven geeks try to score with seven amazingly hot women, all of whom are chasing the grand prize money. It’s no wonder this show has garnered such a strong Internet following. Finally, a show that hosts contestants and events that geeks everywhere can relate to!

One girl Mindi, who just so happens to hook up with the star of the show Richard, definitely leads the pack in the looks department. Suspiciously, she also seems like the smartest of the bunch, and I bet her bimbo image is more of an act than anything else. You see, that’s what I hate about these shows: the producers will edit and coach their cast to make any wanted event an absolute certainty. They should rename the whole genre to shitty amateur acting with extemporaneous elements in a big mansion! Uh-huh.

Mindi is the smallest and daintiest of the chics, wearing a size zero dress size and barely having the strength to pull thru the camping challenge trail walk. Sometimes she looks downright famished. I’m sure upping her caloric-intake and kickin’ the nic wouldn’t hurt her frequent dizzy spells and chronic laziness. But enough silly criticism. This show is all about watching these girls squeeze into hot bikinis, tight jeans and sexy dinner gowns, while watching the nerds squirm in their seats trying not to blast a load, in their pants, on national TV.

I slapped together this video highlight clip of Mindi. I can’t really say what I was thinking at the time, but it was well past midnight and I was blazin’ the blueberry right till the final cut. Enjoy.

She’s already been in the scene for a few months, but after spending some serious quality time on her website, I just had to make a post for her on my blog. Ashley has, what can only be described as, slut-eyes. It’s that kind of look that basically guarantees full-penetration, or at the very least, uncompromised oral. Now personally I’ve never visited the Mid-West, but if teen solo sites give an approximate representation, then there must be a lot of big tittie thoroughbreds from those pastures! Of course I won’t be vacationing to some landlocked, barren cereal box anytime soon.

Thank god for webcams. Ashley suffers from pathological sexual inhibition, or perhaps that’s just what I tell myself after screaming at her for more live shows. Get out the keyboard splash guard and prepare yourself for some prime midwest beef.

Above: AndiPink from Panchodog

Ass scene in Playboy, Miss Luana Lani started her career online after turning 18. Last year she was busy chasing modeling contracts, but after a recent change in management she’s back online and 100% committed to her fans. Spunky, the Kingpin producer behind such teen stars as Kate’s Playground and Sweet Krissy, is taking the reigns to get Luana Lani off to a great start.

Whether blazing the Maui Wowie or drinkin’ gin with the natives, Luana is always up for a good time. In addition to the usual stock of high-res photos and video footage, there are candid pics, webcam vids and a bustling forum on her nifty website.

From what I’ve seen, she’s given some awesome cam shows, and although I can’t present you with any full nude content, rest assured that her tight, bouncy goods are well captured and regularly shown for all her members.

When I was previewing her site, one thing came to mind- this chic is straight Asian dynamite! And I don’t mean that in any racial or historical context (them Asians did build the railroads..). What I’m saying is, a lot of girls have the beauty, but very few know how to perform in an erotic or stimulating fashion. Miss Luana Lani melds slutty-cheerleading moves with her sweet and charming personality, to form a striking presence you will not soon forget. And, fuck, I guess that’s what I meant by Asian dynamite..

So on to the jammin’ video!

Above: Bella Bends Over For LaZona Modelos.

I’m heading back to to check out some more tanned ass from this site. Bob’s already made some killer finds, and I hope he continues scouting South America’s best for more hot content.

Texan friend and notable pussy wrangler Cheesefrog, sent word along with some Kleenex-worth promo shots, that his latest catch Torri’s Secret has gone live. And yes I asked, but they’re not telling. However, judging from what I’ve already seen, she ain’t keeping many secrets! This petite blonde exposes all, with Cheesefrog hitting up the close-ups, drop-downs and all the fast angles his shooting style is famous for. This stunning blonde is just what Cheese has been trying to add to his growing stable of talents—let’s not forget the other stars of Divinity18, the shy, gothic step-child Dakota South, and queen of teens Jayden18.

After letting go several members of my video production unit for sneaking in that rather tasteless cock-punching piece into my last video montage, I’ve had to reluctantly ask them back to kick out this lastest clip in time for Torri’s Secret website debut.

Folks, there is nothing sensual, erotic or safe about getting punched in the junk. And with that out of the way, please enjoy our latest compilation featuring Jayden, Dakota South, Torri’s Secret and the legend himself, Cheesefrog.

*Update*

I was notified by several readers that the person I have depicted as Cheesefrog in the video is actually current Shooto champion Tatsuya Kawajiri. They’re both reputedly tough dudes who sport Astroboy-mullets. I guess I got the two confused. My apologies!

Above: Radar Magazine features some kickass ads.

So I rip it open to find that none other than link partner Danny Rado penned the cover story! Holy shit, and I thought he was just one of the dads of Huckapoo. Anyway, at half the price of a copy of WIRED, well, I just tossed it into my bag and walked out of the store like I owned the place. You charge me $1.20 for an Oh Henry, and I’ll be needing something to read while I’m shitting it out!

Then I’m reading an article on my way home when I stumble across words like ‘pantina‘ and, um, “emerged.” Right. So my ADD kicks in and at this point I’m basically just flipping through looking for racy pics.

The best porn in the mag comes just three pages deep. There’s a spread of a naked, foxy looking cheer-bitch, sporting a tight bum that’s half submerged in some sort of cave water. She’s giving a look like she just had the best anal sex in town. But obviously not from the guy standing opposite. The dude has the build of a 10-year old boy!

Well..to come to think about it, they both kind of look like 10 year old boys! Uhhh uh-oh.

Ok, so that was actually an ad for Calvin Klein. But I assure you the real editorial content is witty, interesting and full of memorable quotes that I’m sure to rip-off and use right here on my blog. Basically, I give Radar Magazine a 7/10 for jerkable material. It features all the hot celebs you’ve come to expect, but not so much hand-thrusting content that would make you totally ignore the great articles, confusing flow-charts and distracting asides.

Being the premiere edition, I decided to let my production team create a video preview for this special occasion. Check out the viddy below.

If there ever was a feng shui to softcore pornography, legendary ass-mechanic Phil-Flash has definitely mastered the art of capturing delicious dumpers, at just the right angles. The work of Phil-Flash cannot be mistaken. Take for instance his classic rearview photography: jacked up heels, ass pushed back, hands spread out on the wall. It is this recognizable style that propelled such names as Tiffany Teen and Nikki-Next-Door to the top 5 teen solo models of the world.

But what makes Phil Flash so interesting is not his fantastic use of ass-trology, his cunning

knowledge of ass-matics, or being a bald-headed pervert from the dirty South. No. It’s his surprising rise from an unemployed, small-town hick to the CEO of a champion stable with enough thoroughbred talents to please at least 6 decent websites.

His sudden breakthrough came when he happened across a then, 18-year old Tiffany Teen. He didn’t know about websites. He didn’t know about the adult scene. He hadn’t even shot any commercial content. But as Phil-Flash recalls, when you have a drop-dead gorgeous blonde on your living room floor wearing tiny panties covered in little puppy prints, you’re not going to explain why you keep adjusting your pants, or keep visiting in the washroom every 5 minutes, or use a Kodak disposable to take your shots. When you’re shooting solid gold there’s a feeling that great history is being made, and all you gotta do is point, click, and keep her back arched with the ass way-the-fuck out!

Despite his amateurism and lack of experience, the scene was to love his work and take notice of his unique style. Before long, he had a stable full of girls and the confidence to keep the hits coming.

Fast-forward to the present..

You might have heard of Brandy’s Box, but then again, you likely haven’t. Some people naively assume that they can handle it all: a solo effort at photography, web design, promotion and everything else that is needed to run a successful website. But it’s highly unrealistic in this day and age to run a one-person managed teen site. So after a while on her own, Brandy rightly chose to look for someone with the skills and track record to take her box to the next level. And with great applause she’s now joined the Phil Flash All-Stars, which should do wonders for her image and shift some of the attention on her ‘box’ to her tight rear gear.

Don’t miss out on the hilarious spanking video on her main page!