Rapid Teen Models 18+

Some were wondering if Felix, from Felix Flow, was a one hit wonder. With only the lone, but highly popular Kari Sweets solo-model signed to his label, it seemed obvious that Felix had a few issues finding fresh talent.

Well, I am happy to report that Kari has finally gotten a label-mate, as she is now joined by Kimi, as in Kisses From Kimi.

Kimi is somewhat of a mystery to me, as her facial features are a bit ethnically ambiguous. Also, the color of her hair looks like it could go either way. But aside from these intriguing questions (that we’ll eventually ask Felix about) Kimi rocks a tight and curvy body – one that is clearly A-class and deserving of special attention.

I picked a few galleries from Kisses From Kimi that I hope you’ll check out. At the time of writing, these galleries are not supposed to be publically available - so keep this shit on the down-lo! The last time I pissed off Felix, he challenged me to a jujitsu match, but I had to decline because I forgot to bring my groin cup (I put it on backwards when I wrestle him). Anyhow, enjoy a little taste of Kisses From Kimi!

Kisses From Kimi - bright pink thong

Kisses From Kimi - nature shot

Most guys would like a girl with a great rack. But ask any man to describe his ideal breast size, and you will get a variety of answers, from mouth-sized grapefruits to top-heavy zeppelins.

I guess it’s no different for ass – some like them tiny and toned, whilst others are looking for the epitome of dumper bums.

For me, the only type of breasts that I really don’t care for are fakies, particularly ones that look obscenely unnatural (you know, like rubber toilette plungers stuck to a wall). These girls were likely very flat before they got their implants, and unfortunately, they went for a size too large for their body type.

Well, no need to worry about seeing implants here. We only feature all-natural girls – ones that are comfortable and confident in the way they naturally look. These chics would never resort to silly surgeries to look any different from what god gave them.

To make my point, here are a couple of awesome college girls who have delicious bodies, despite having different chest sizes:

• Tanner Mays
• Devi
• Nelly
• Meggan
• Vally

So girls, if you’re listening, don’t get implants! Instead, just get naked more often, because that’s something every man will appreciate.

Kristen Stewart as a blonde or brunette? I think she’s adorably cute in either hair color, although, judging from her brusque and disheveled acting performance in Twilight, I’d say she’d makes a better blonde!

Seriously, was I the only person who noticed at how bad Kristen Stewart’s acting was during the film?

Throughout most of the flick, Kristen seemingly struggles with her lines, often complementing words with weird, awkward faces. She’s like an autistic kid who’s snorted way too much Ritalin.

Sure, you could blame the director for some of the cheese that should of been cut from this film, or even the scriptwriters for dropping all the unecessary verbiage throughout this two hour feature, but at the end of the day, this is all overshadowed by Kristen Stewart’s particularly egregious attempt at acting.

But let’s focus on the postive - Kristen Stewart is fucking hot!

Although now of legal age, it appears that Kristen still isn’t ready to go nude on  the big screen just yet. But the good new is, we do catch a glimpse of her sexy green underwear in a sappy bedroom scene about half way through the film. The bad news is, by this point, you’ve likely fallen asleep or set your TV on fire!

Tossing a tartan school girl outfit on an already smokin’ hot chic, is like Billy Mays cleaning your kitchen and toilets - KABOOM!

There’s something sexy about the tartan look that drives all men crazy; it’s like throwing hot sauce on any type of meat - things just get better!

But it really boggles my mind why tartan skirts aren’t frequently worn by women of all ages - at college, at work, on windy bridges - why the fuck does it have to be culturally limited to the realm of private school jailbait? If I ran the world, one-in-three women would have to dress like this (the other two-thirds would go naked).

Until the school girl style becomes as common as Crocs and yoga pants, at least we can still see girls like Darcy and Keymy pulling off the look. Damn they look sexy!

Apologies for the long absence, but Rapid Teens is definitely back!

Having a christian inspired change of heart, I exited the adult industry suddenly, and went on to enjoy a brief stint as a mainstream middle class 9-to-5 work droid. Needless to say, it was not the Anglo-American dream that I thought it would be (like why aren’t all the girls topless and hot?!).

Firstly, co-workers suck ass. And so do multi-layers of redundant managers and supervisors who are always trying dong-pong your charlie hole.

And as for my religious views: I’m pretty sure Noah didn’t build a giant tanker, Jonah never lived in a fish (seriously, WTF), and Jesus never water skied. So I’m back to my free-loving, shemale banging ways. Living life as an irresponsible agnostic is definitely the sweet spot!

So stay tuned, and keep Rapid Teens in your bookmarks. You don’t want to miss our famous selection of the industry’s finest!

BTW- that’s Skylar in the photo above, taken from Cheesefrog’s Divinity18.